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Picture me in an unbuttoned white linen shirt
NIKON D70 - 1/4000 sec, f 4 at 29 mm, ISO

Picture me in an unbuttoned white linen shirt

If you've watched Discovery Channel or the History Channel over the last few months, you'll have seen tourism ads for 100% Pure New Zealand. Actually, I guess if you live anywhere else in the world other than here you might have seen them.

They are your usual tourism ads. They have the cool music in the background with copious amounts of footage taken from helicopters. Swooping shots of beaches and vertigo inducing shots of mountains and valleys and bush and lakes. All that crap.

But they also have the feel good stuff. The activities that you just have to do when you get here. It occured to me last night that I haven't done any the stuff or been to any of the places that they depict in the ads. And that bothers me a little. I bloody live here.

While worrying about that I realized why (quite apart from the fact I don't own a helicopter). I mean, I can't recall me ever navigating my huge yacht up to a waterfall somewhere in Fiordland with a skinny chick on the bow, clad in a very small bikini, smiling sexily (is that a word?) and looking lovingly at me in my eye-burning white linen shirt that is unbuttoned (and untucked) to reveal my hairless chest.

If that's the kind of stuff you can do in New Zealand, then bugger me, I want to go there too. And I want to go to Australia too. Because it looks like they have way more skinny bikini-wearing babes in their ads. And one of them is saucily asking "where the bloody hell" I am.

I'm on my way darling!

Fork me I'm in a hole with photos right now.

Captured: 2006:03:15 17:42:07
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2006, 8:36 pm


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